The Bard’s Birthday!

Ratvaark in a tunic and feathered hat, faces the audience on the stage of the Vaark Theatre,

Hello Friends! Today is St Georges Day, but it is also the birthday of the great playwright, William Shakespeare, and so we present a selection of scenes from his plays to celebrate.

“All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women (and vaarks) merely players.

They have their exits and their entrances; And one man (vaark) in his time plays many parts.”

(As You Like It)

Ratvaark in a tunic and feathered hat, faces the audience on the stage of the Vaark Theatre,

“Once more unto the… no, no. Breach, dear friends. BREACH. Not beach.”

(Henry V)

Vincent, in Henry V’s tunic and helmet, looks at a bunch of vaarks with a parasol, life ring, beach ball, boat, knotted hankie, towel etc

“What light through yonder window breaks? It is the East and Juliet is the sun”

(Romeo and Juliet)

Dim as Romeo looks up at Matilda as Juliet on a balcony

I’m not sure that’s a good idea Romeo, the balcony doesn’t look very strong.

Dim starts to climb up a knotted rope to the balcony


The balcony has come away from the wall and both are lying on the floor

“Friends, Romans, Countrymen, Lend me your ears. “

(Julius Caesar)

Arnold in his floral dressing gown toga, talks to vaarks dressed as Roman soldiers, wearing false ears

Well, that IS a lot of spare ears!

Arnold is wearing several pairs of ears on his snozzle

“Now is the winter of our discontent.” Discontent, Winston, not discount tent.

(Richard III)

Winston is trying to sell a tent, with a REDUCED sign on it, to Ernest.

“If music be the food of love, play on.”. Oh food! Keep playing, keep playing!

(Twelfth Night)

Ratvaark, with a cake, jelly and plates of sandwiches, looks at a group of vaarks playing instruments.

Not a scene as such, but the most famous stage direction: Exit pursued by a Bear.

(A Winters Tale)

Micro and Nano flee from a soft toy bear

Hello Bernard, what are you counting?

Ofelia talks to Bernard, who has his abacus

Ah, I see, you’ve taken up honey production and you’re checking your workers. “Two bee or not two bee.”


Bernard reveals a bee hive, with three little bees flying around it.

“All that glisters is not gold.”

(The Merchant of Venice)

Esther, Vincent and Ernest look at a gold foil wrapped egg.

No indeed, sometimes, it’s even better! Chocolate!

The egg is unwrapped to reveal chocolate, and Ernest waves his snozzle in joy

“Double, double, toil and trouble, fire burn and cauldron bubble!” I’m not sure I fancy Ofelia’s latest recipe….


Esther, Peggy and Ofelia are gathered round a fire, and Ofelia carries a cauldron of green bubbling goo.

And so, finally:

“If we shadows have offended,
Think but this, and all is mended,
That you have but slumbered here
While these visions did appear.”

(A Midsummer Night’s Dream)

All the vaarks are assembled on stage

Oh heck!

Ratvaark looks off to the right

It’s that bear again! Exit, everyone, quick!

Everyone exits left, pursued by the bear

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