All the fun of the fete!

Hello! Welcome to our Bank Holiday Fete! I hope we’re all going to have a lot of fun!

Ratvaark addresses the camera in front of a fete scene

We’ve got all the usual attractions – Winston’s catering outlets, candy floss and lots of games and competitions.

Oh, here’s a new attraction for this year, a hoop-la stand! Fury’s going to have a go…

Oh! Well, you haven’t won a prize, but you have won Nano!

Fury looks at her hoop, which has landed round Nanovaark

Peggy is minding the “Guess the Weight of the Cake” stand this year. Micro is asking whether it’s metric or imperial. She says it’s Victoria sponge, so probably Imperial.

Micro looks at the sponge cake on the Guess the Weight stall

Bernard is very interested in something on Winston’s bric a brac stall. Is it the fishing rod, or the umbrella?

Bernard looks at Winston’s stall

Oh, no, it’s the pot they are sitting in. He asks Winston where he got it. Winston said it came in a job lot and it was handy for storing tall things.

Bernard says he thinks it might be quite old and valuable and Winston should get it checked out at the museum. It might be a Greek Urn!

Bernard looks closely at the design of vaark warrior on the urn

What’s a Greek Urn? said Winston. “About 10 drachmas a day!” chipped in Vincent. They all laughed, but Bernard said they really ought to find out about the urn.

BernardBernard talks to Winston and Vincent talks to Winston and Vincent

Now, it’s time for the Maypole dance! We do enjoy this. We go round and round, in and out, in ancient intricate patterns until we all meet in the middle. Now, how’s that?

Oh. Well, it might not be Quite Right, but it was fun.

The ribbons are just tangled around the top of the pole

On to the next entertainment, the Morris Dancers! Hypno is playing accordion. He couldn’t find his boater, so I lent him my fez.

Round and round, in and out they go, with Dim playing the fool in the middle. Oh look! Nano’s joining in for a ride!

A close up of Nano on Bernards tail

After all that exertion, we sat down to watch Peggy’s puppet show. All except Hypno and Arnold, who have to go and fetch something they’ve arranged.

The vaarks sit around a puppet theatre, as hypno and Arnold head off to one side

Oh, what a surprise! What fun! Hypno’s made some funny photo boards! He’s going to take our pictures!

Hypno and Arnold have brought some boards with holes cut in, we can only see the backs of them

Look at me! How do you like my costume! And Esther, that’s quite some bikini! This is so much fun!

The fronts of the boards are comedy seaside postcard style pictures, with holes for the heads. Hypno has an old fashioned camera with a hood.The fronts of the boards are comedy seaside postcard style pictures, with holes for the heads. Hypno has an old fashioned camera with a hood.

We are all enjoying this!

Nano says it’s all very well, but he can’t reach!

Nano looks up at Matilda posing as the skinny man

Oh! It’s ok! Hypno has thought of Nano, he has his own little window!

Oh hello Micro, what’s that? You’ve arranged something yourself? Good grief! A high diving platform!

Microvaark addresses everyone

Microvaark stands in front of a pool with a ladder reaching up out of one side.

Oh gosh, up he goes! Up and Up! So high!

He’s right at the top! Surely he’s not going to.. Yes, he’s dived!

Oh! A parachute! Look at him gliding down! How clever! Such a soft landing!

Well that was exciting. But you know, I think I could do that jump. Well, no-one’s looking now…

As everyone goes back the fete, Ratvaark looks at the pool and board

Here we go!

Ratvaark has climbed up to the top of the board

Whoops! Sorry everyone!

Ratvaark has landed hard in the pool scattering polystyrene all over the place

Well, it’s getting on, so it’s time for the best bit of our fete – the street party feast! Peggy is bringing over the Victoria Sponge cake.

Ofelia and Bernard have made rhyming sandwiches – jam, spam and Edam! Matida’s jelly is spectacular. And Winston and Vincent rustled up some little buns.

Winston and Vincent have a 3 tiered stand of cakes

Ernest has brought jugs of squash, and Fury made some toffee apples!

Goodness. Esther did some research into WW2 and read about how they used to give children carrots on sticks, instead of lollies! She’s made enough for us all apparently. Oh good.

Esther brings a tray of carrots on sticks

Still Ernest got a funny shaped one, which made us all laugh!

Ernest has a carrot on a stick, that is forked like two legs.

Well, we have had a lovely day, and this is a feast to round it all off. We’ll be enjoying ourselves for hours. I hope you’ve had a good day too!

Ratvaark addresses the camera as the party goes on.


All the fun of the fete!

Well, we’re very excited, it’s time for our May fete! We’ve got all the usual food and snack concessions set up.

The vaarks gather at the May fete

Gino is minding the ice cream van and Vincent’s taken charge of the Burger Box. Winston’s got so many enterprises he can’t run them all.

In fact, Winston has really gone up a step – he’s got himself a market barrow, selling antiques and second hand stuff.

Winston shows off his new barrow

Fury’s spotted a really decent drill for her toolbox, and Microvaark is very pleased with his bicycle. Bernard said he didn’t know Microvaark could even ride a bicycle!

Ofelia is looking after the donuts. When Nano asked for some and she asked “How many?” he said “Five of course!” Esther, who is a bit controlled than some, is supervising the Guess the Weight of the Cake stall. Fury offered to help if the cake turned out to be too heavy….

Winston had to do a quick run round when Tessa showed an interest in the Pistachio Shy, but it turned out she was just wondering about his spelling. Someone had already told her the nuts were glued on…

tessa looks at the pistachio shy as winston talks to her

Alan had a go on the tombola and was very pleased when he drew the winning ticket!

Peggy and Mary are running the teas, and… oh hello Dim, you’re looking after the Candy Floss this year? Where’s Matilda? What’s that, she’s got a new enterprise?

Oh! A POPCORN stand! That’s amazing. There was soon a big long queue for popcorn and Matilda was worried she might run out.

So she turned the heat up a bit. There, now it’s popping nicely. Er… Maybe a bit TOO nicely. Run!

Phew, it’s run out of corn and stopped! Winston’s in a flap though, he’s lost his hat in there! But then we realised something even worse. Nanovaark’s in there too!

Ernest quickly stuck his snozzle in, and rooted about sniffing. Thankfully, he soon found Nano, who was sheltering in Winston’s hat. He said he thought he wouldn’t have any more popcorn for a while please. All’s well, as Matilda sweeps up!

After all that excitement, we sat down to enjoy the Punch and Judy show. Nano made sure he got a good view, and Arnold could hardly even feel his weight.

Next it was time for the Morris Dancers. Dim played the Fool as usual, and Hypno played the accordion.

As ever, we’re having a traditional Maypole dance. Can we make it two years running without getting tangled up? Oh Ernest, I don’t think it needs steadying. Whoops! Oh dear, we did it again.

Once we’d freed Ernest, a little voice said “ There’s a good view from up here!” Oh Nano, get down!!

Of course, after the fete, we always have the funfair! Arnold has brought along his Test Your Strength machine, and he’s changed into his Grandfather’s circus strongman leotard. Nano is impressed.

Tessa had a go and did very well, but Arnold was a bit alarmed when Fury insisted on using her Flipping Big Hammer!

Everyone giggled at their reflections in the Hall of Mirrors and Dim and Matilda enjoyed a romantic swing on the swingboat.

Ernest was hard at work turning the ladle-go-round. Look at it go! Look at Ofelia’s ears waving in the wind!

Of course, we are very excited this year to have our Ferris Wheel, which was a mystery present from an anonymous friend. Fury has even arranged a steam traction engine to turn it!

Some of us were more interested in the steam engine than the wheel, so Fury shows them how it works and how she keeps it running with her oily rag.

The wheel is great fun and the view from the top is great. What lucky vaarks we are, to have such friends!